Maybe

I have been writing this past week but I haven't felt like sharing it. I have just been trying to process some things. so, rather than leave a blank page, here is another poem I wrote for my
Ethnic studies class.

Maybe
19 years ago sitting at the edge of the sandbox in a new school I read my books.
Last pick for kickball?
Odd teams
Back to the sandbox. The hardy boys were always good at what they do. Maybe I’m just good at reading.

14 years ago The barn. Face to Face. Man those guys with the shaved heads and wife beater shirts are scary. Greg and Steve content to sit in the back.
I need to feel
the energy of the crowd.
Push forward. Crowd surfing, floating along outstretched hands. Maybe I am beginning to find my place.

9 years ago Wish the air conditioning wasn’t broken. Maybe I should have taken my English class more seriously. At least then I wouldn’t have made my mom cry
when I told her I wouldn’t be walking.
School was a social experiment but I guess I forgot the teachers had other opinions. Maybe I just have to stumble along.

4 years ago I’m going to be a father? I can barely take care of myself Do I have love to give?
I’m going to be
a father.
All the love I have is yours. Fear of the unknown chokes me. One foot forward just like any other step.
Maybe it’s time to mellow out.

Today I’m graduating college. Chemical Engineer, father, husband? Weren’t you in band with plaid pants and a thrift store shirt that said Earl? I’ll still shop at goodwill.
I’m still punk
I guess. How many 27 year olds do you know that are just graduating from college and have two children and a wife?
Maybe I won’t embarrass my daughters too much.

2 Responses to "Maybe"

Patti Bangerter (visit their site)

Hey Mitch, it is Patti Bangerter.
You have been in my thoughts since I found about Tracy's death. Telling you that I am sorry for your loss doesn't even come close to what I would like to say if I could find the words. It is just not fair. I could tell you that it was Heavenly Fathers plan however at this point in time that is hard to understand why he would take Tracy from you. I know the gospel is true, the plan of salvation and I am so grateful for that understanding however it does not make it easy to go through what you are going through. I don't know what you are going through although your blog helps me to understand. You are a deep writer and good. When did you start writing. Email me, when you are ready, Patti_Bangerter@yahoo.com

Fife Family (visit their site)

I've been thinking of Traci today, since it's her birthday. I miss her!