and yesterday almost felt like normal days. The girls played nice and didn't shout at each other. Autumn threw up about 20 minutes ago, but she said her tummy hurt all evening and skipped dinner so I knew it was coming. My greif(by the way i think that is a stupid word to describe what I'm feeling/going through, but I guess mental and physical ninja dropkick donkey kick is too wordy for daily use)is coming on at mostly predictable times and intervals. I am still stressed about money, but whatever. I just have to try and trust that everything will work out. I read a blog from a woman who was a sister missionary in Ohio with me. She as talking about how she knew everything was in God's plan and how beautiful the spirit was in the room where her sister-in-law gave birth to a stillborn son with only a month left in the pregnancy. I am searching for that peace and clarity but it feels like a dark forest I am trying to find my way out of. Two halves of me. One believes that although I can't see it I am being led out on a watched path out into the light. The other, believes that I am lost and alone in the forest with only the shouts of friends and family coming from a distance as my guide.

4 Responses to "Today"

Phipps Family (visit their site)

I am sorry to hear about Autumn getting sick and I hope she is better soon. It is misserable for everyone when a child is sick.

Just remember Mitch that all of the feelings that you are having- sometimes normal days and mental and physical ninja dropkick donkey kick- are 'normal' for what you are going through. You have allot of family and friends who will always be shouting out to you.

Michelle (visit their site)

Yuck, that flu is going around, that is for sure.

Like all of us you will have good and bad days. Although yours might seem a little worst on the bad days right now. Just remember that your friends, family and some people you don't really even know too well are shouting out to you and cheering for you. Just remember "you can do hard things."

The Nephites (visit their site)

hey mitch, its Rachael (Packer)Saline. I just wanted to leave my "shout" for you that we are thinking about and praying for you guys all of the time. Thank you for the blogging. Sickness is spreading! my kids have been sick all week!

The Bangerter Family (visit their site)

Hey Mitch. Good to see the blog. I love reading it. You should be a writer. Your work is amazing. are you still in town (SJ) or back in Riverside? My oldest daughter is almost two and if you and the girls are around maybe we could have a play date! What is your work schedule like? Mark is in between jobs so you two could chat and I will play with the kids. :) I could even fix us some lunch (we live right by a park). Let me know at or I will check back here. Also, the movie theatre does free kids movies on Tues and Wed. I could take the girls one day if you wanted or help watch the girls if you are still in town. I know daycare is expensive! Talk to you soon!-Crystal